Friday, 30 November

The last day of November, where did this month go. I worked yesterday at both jobs so not much to report on my day yesterday, I'm doing it again today - I'm only there till 9:00 pm though so planning on going out with friends after work. The day was good, busy still, at lunch went home and let the dogs out, they were so happy for me to be home for a little bit, finished my day at the first job and went directly to the second one. I really am enjoying it at Macy's. I get to work with Dan and he is a lot of fun and everything there has been so nice. My evening flew by - it was crazy busy. Holiday shoppers and all. So after work, came home and got cleaned up. I had to go get a shot during my afternoon and it always makes me a little nauseous so I wasn't hungry at all. Didn't eat all day so I had a slight headache. Took some aspirins and we headed out. Picked up Michael and we headed to Canada. We had a really good time, went to a bar there and hung out with some friends. The part that stunk was that we were stuck in the tunnel on the way home for 1 1/2 hours. We didn't get home till after 3 am. I had an early day on Saturday so I was going to be exhausted.

Thursday, 29 November

So I've been thinking about how much clutter I have around the house, well - more like too much stuff that I need to part with. Not just the physical stuff, the mental stuff as well. So I went online to try and find some ways to help "De-Clutter" my life. Here is what I found:

Exercise. This goes along the same lines as eating healthy, as it simplifies your life in the long run, but it goes even further: exercise helps burn off stress and makes you feel better. It’s great.
Declutter before organizing. Many people make the mistake of taking a cluttered desk or filing cabinet or closet or drawer, and trying to organize it. Unfortunately, that’s not only hard to do, it keeps things complicated. Simplify the process by getting rid of as much of the junk as possible, and then organizing. If you declutter enough, you won’t need to organize at all. Have a place for everything. Age-old advice, but it’s the best advice on keeping things organized.
Find inner simplicity. I’m not much of a spiritual person, but I have found that spending a little time with my inner self creates a peaceful simplicity rather than a chaotic confusion. This could be time praying or communing with God, or time spent meditating or journaling or getting to know yourself, or time spent in nature. However you do it, working on your inner self is worth the time.
Learn to decompress from stress. Every life is filled with stress — no matter how much you simplify your life, you’ll still have stress (except in the case of the ultimate simplifier, death). So after you go through stress, find ways to decompress.

Wednesday, 28 November

Happy Hump Day... don't say that often enough. It's going to be a long day today, I start my second job after work today and should be there till about 10 pm - so very long day. The day was good though, still really busy on my project and didn't realize it was time for lunch until a hour after I normally leave. Had to go home and let the animals out, I did some painting at home while I was there. I'm trying to do one wall a day and this is the last wall day. It's all stripes so lots of taping. Picked up pictures at Costco on the way back to work, then finished my day at lear. After that, I headed to Macy's. I had to do some paperwork there and log onto their computer system. Unfortunately the system was down so I waited for about an hour then had to go home until Tomorrow. Not bad though, I was home by 5:30. Got home and made some dinner, we ate and watched some TV. I finished my painting of the room, took down the tape. I think it looks pretty darn cute. So after painting the room, I cleaned it up a bit. I have some white stripes I want to paint still but it will have to wait a few days. After that, got the gym bag packed, clothes out for tomorrow and then watched some TV in bed before falling asleep.

Tuesday, 27 November

I am feeling really good again - I feel refreshed and work is keeping me so busy, it's a great feeling. Lots to do though today.... Work, gym, work then I have to head home and go grocery shopping - I just need to pick up a few things. After that, I have to pick up some paint for the Nursery - going with "It's a girl - Pink", it's going to be Pink, Brown and White. Sounds different but really cute, I picked up a new bedding set for the crib and it looks really nice. After that, I have to rake again and clean up all the leaves on the back deck. (We have no big trees in our yard but from the neighbors trees we have tons and tons of leaves). Okay - so the day went by really fast - I love keeping busy at work... So took care of all the errands and was able to watch "Samantha Who?" That is now my favorite show on TV, I love Christina Applegate and the girl from Gilmore girls on that show is cousins with Jenny McCarthy.

Monday, 26 November

New week but I feel so refreshed. Went to bed early last night so got plenty of sleep. Got to the gym and did over 70 minutes of cardio and then some Abs. Energy level is great so it should be a pretty terrific day. Got plenty to do when I get home so hopefully my work day goes by quickly. Need to paint some more - got one wall painting in the nursery - 3 more to go. I also need to go to the store with Michael to help him get a wireless router. That way we can play against each other in Wii. So after work, I did paint the second wall. Had to pull everything off of it, move everything from the room and tape it up. I put two 1/2 coats of paint on - it's a pretty pink. It's called - "It's a girl pink". After the second coat, I went to Best Buy with Michael and we got the Wireless router then went up to the mall. I am going to be working at the Mall during the holiday to earn some extra cash. I start tomorrow. After that, came back home - put on another coat (well, almost a full coat) then removed the tape. After that, got stuff ready for Tuesday and then went to bed. Oh, I did have a salad at the mall - it was delicious..... It was a really good day.

Sunday, 25 November

I slept so well, didn't get up untill about 8:00 am or so. Felt so nice to sleep in - refreshed. So had some coffee and we immediately started playing Wii. It was so much fun, we played bowling and golf. That was fun, we want to go get some new games - so goal is go shopping later on in the day for that. We played until about 11:00 am or so then we both got cleaned up and headed out for a few errands. We went to TJ Maxx then to Costco - I got some pictures developed there so had to pick them up and we got a few other things as well. After that, we went to CiCi's pizza (it's a pizza buffet) It was okay, pizza not that good but salad bar was okay and the desserts were awesome. After lunch, we headed back home and relaxed for a while. Watched some TV and a movie. After that, did some more laundry and packed up my stuff for Monday. Kurt returned our movies and I made dinner. Orange chicken...it was pretty darn good. After dinner, I was ready for bed - so I pretty much got in my pj's and went to bed. Started to watch the Simpsons but was asleep before it ended... A new week begins and Christmas is just around the corner. 30 days and counting....

Saturday, 24 November

So got up and showered, got some breakfast (they had a great continental breakfast bar at the hotel). Drank a lot of coffee then got Olivia bathed and dressed. So we were a little worried about putting her in the pack and play to sleep - 1) It was in the car all day and we were worried it would be too cold for her and 2) It is so big, was nervous about her rolling over and sufficating. So Kurt had the great idea of tipping over the night stand and we made a make shift bed for her. She fit in there perfectly and slept really well. Plus it was right next to the bed so I could be right there for her if she woke up. When she fell asleep she was holding my finger - I think she likes knowing that we are right there with her. Anyway - see picture. After getting ready, headed over to Mom's house for some more breakfast (All I did was eat this entire holiday break). Then Lisa, Katie, Heather and I went to Target for a little shopping. After that, came back to the house, played some cards, worked on the computer a bit then it was time to head home. We had a great time and I enjoyed every minute of it. We got in the car and headed home, I drove, Kurt and Olivia slept. Made really good time. We were suppose to drop Olivia off by 5:00 but we didn't get home till about 6:00 pm. Changed her and fed her one last time before taking her home. Unfortunately no one was home, so brought Olivia back home with us for a couple of more hours. After dropping her off the second time, we went out with Mark, John, Dan and Mike for a little bit. We were home within a few hours, both of us were so tired.

Friday, 23 November

Today was a very long day. Olivia woke up around 1:00 am or so, well instead of trying to put her back to bed - I decided to get up with her and head out to shop. Meijer had advertised that they will have at least 30 Wii systems in the store so I headed out in search of one. Luckily, the store is open 24/7 so I was inside and out of the cold. Got to the store around1:30 and there was already a line but luckily for me I was number 19. I immediately called Michael and got him to come in, he was 29. Thank gosh because there was only 30 game systems available. So we waited in line for over 4 hours but some people were there as of 8:00 pm the night before (I'm crazy but not that crazy). Olivia was so good, she slept through most of the time we were there. I feed her around 4:30 am and she went back to bed for another hour or so. Around 5:00 is when they brought out the Wii systems (Did I mention there was about 200 people in line but they only gave out numbers for 30 of them... some people were not too happy about that... I was though, I got my Wii). Anyway, we finally got to the register around 5:30 and was out by 6:00 am. After that, decided I was just too tired and headed home (I did stop for some delicious McDonald's coffee on the way). Got home, unpacked everything - put Olivia back to bed (Such an angel) then tried to go back to bed myself. I ended up getting out of bed around 7:00 am (I never got back to sleep) and started my day. We set up the Wii and got it hooked up to the wireless network (Now we can play against Bonnie & Michelle, Todd, Michael & Dan, Robin and Jim - they all have the systems too). After playing for a little bit, did some laundry and cleaned up a bit. After that, had to pack up the car - pack and play, bouncy chair, baby clothes, diaper bag, stroller, blankets, toys, etc.... plus pack stuff for me, the desserts and other stuff I'm forgetting to list. Got in the car and headed to Charlotte. We had a terrific day, got to hang out with the family, play with the kids, play cards, exchange gifts, eat, eat, eat & eat. It was a really great day and by 8:30 we were exhausted. We headed to the hotel room but stopped at Meijer on the way to get a 2nd Wii controller and some baby oatmeal. Got checked in, unloaded everything, changed olivia and fed her then put her to bed and I fell asleep immediately. Olivia was so good, she slept in til about 4:30, I fed her and she went back to bed until 7:30. I was really happy about that, I got some sleep as well (I really needed it - I was going on two days with only 2 hours of sleep).

Thursday, 22 November

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Wow, what a wonderful holiday this was. Got to spend time with my family and friends and had a really enjoyable long weekend. Thanksgiving is my favorite Holiday - it's about spending time with people you love and it really is a time to be thankful. I am very blessed for so many things... too many to even list here. Thanksgiving day was very nice, I picked up Olivia in the morning, then started cleaning and cooking. Everyone was over by 3:30, we had appetizers to start with, people played games, we chatted and relaxed - around 5:30 we had dinner. It was so good, everything was delicious. We watched a movie while playing cards, then did some cleaning up of the dishes. Around 8:30, I put Olivia to bed and we had most of the house cleaned up. I was exhausted... didn't go to bed till about 10 pm or so. It was a pretty terrific Thanksgiving.

Wednesday, 21 November

Someone sent me this and I thought it was funny.. So there is this woman whose voice is worse then nails on a chalk board... there are several people in my office that think the same thing. It's hard to describe - it's like she puts inflection in the wrong part of the words, almost like everything is a questions... and she talks non-stop. She seems to be a nice lady but man, I am constantly thinking of ways to politely shut her up. I just bought a pair of noise eliminating head phones... just because of her. My office is horrible with the amount of noise going on in here. I have my headphones on all day long just because of it. There use to be a guy here that would cough non-stop then there was a woman that smoked non-stop and she had this bad smoker's cough now it's this woman and her annoying voice. I moved to this area about 8 months ago and it's been non-stop noise... Hopefully those headphones arrive soon.

Tuesday, 20 November

Just one more day to go till a nice long vacation. 4 Days off... I'm excited about that. So Tuesday was a good day - got home from work and put up some of the outdoor Christmas lights. It looks nice - for now, need to put up the lights on the roof but that will be after Thanksgiving. Just wanted a few things out for the big day. After that, came inside and folded clothes and put my things away. Always fun when you have three loads of laundry that need to be folded. Kurt got home and I made some dinner, nothing fancy Soup and sandwiches. We ate dinner, played some cards and made it a very relaxing evening. I tried playing the new XBOX 360 games I got but one of them didn't work... will have to take it back. Besides that - it was an uneventful evening.

Monday, 19 November

New week but it's a short one. Only have to work Monday till Wednesday and Wednesday we will get out early... Excited about that. I have a lot to do before Thanksgiving. Cleaning, decorating and all the food. So the week should fly by. I felt pretty good this morning, slept really well and had plenty of energy for the gym. Watched part of a movie while I worked out and read a magazine. My work day went well too - busy and ended up not taking a lunch. Worked right threw it. After work had to head back to KMart to get the rest of the groceries I paid for but didn't get - so aggravating. Got home and fed all the animals and then started putting some of the lights outside. Two little trees don't light up so have to figure that out - probably just get new lights for it. Then made dinner - Grilled Cheese and Tomato soup, that was good - I made it with bacon and turkey. After dinner, folded clothes and did a few more loads of laundry. Mike and Dan came over and we had some ice cream. I showed them the grossiest website ever - can't even talk about it - so gross. Uck, makes me nauseous just thinking about it. After that, pretty much went to bed... fell asleep quickly and slept really well.

Sunday, 19 November

Got up early with the animals, fed them, let them outside then did some laundry. Lots to do. Kurt made a really good breakfast - it was eggs with potatoes and vegetables and toast. Very yummy. So ate some breakfast then got cleaned up and headed out for some errands. Had to run to Pronto! to pick up some images from Marty, then went to Michaels. Kurt needed some stuff for the mantel decorations. We then went to lunch at Panera bread - very good. After lunch we saw the movie Fred Claus - it was okay, not the greatest but at least it was a movie with a happy ending. After the movies we went to Target and picked up a few things. Came home, Kurt worked on decorating the mantel and I cleaned around the house. That was pretty much the rest of the evening. Oh, we went to Kmart too to get a few groceries and of course I left one of the bags there so I have to go back on Monday. For dinner I picked up take out - man, we ate so bad this weekend... ugh. I will need to do some extra workouts for that. After dinner, I got everything ready for Monday and then went to bed. I think I fell asleep before Family Guy was over. Tired and drained.

Saturday, 17 November

Baby it's cold outside. We got a little bit of snow, not much - just a dusting. But it got me into a little more of the Christmas spirit. But I admit, I do hate the snow for the most part. It's fine until Christmas then I'm over it. So today was a really nice day though, got to spend it with Olivia (Claire, Lilly...) and my family. Picked up Olivia around 8:30 am and brought her home. She is so adorable. She was ready to eat so fed her, burped her then changed her diaper. She was happy. After that, I had her with me while I organized my closet downstairs and dresser drawers. I got this bouncer - it has music and it vibrates and Olivia loved it. Everytime she touched the fish on it, it would play another song. So did that for a few hours - I cleared out over a hundred T-Shirts. After that, cleaned up and we headed over to my brother's house for Ivy's birthday party. She turned one - She is getting so big. My little angel niece was so cute. She is learning to point and she points to everything. She was so excited about her birthday. I had a great time, Olivia was so cute too. She and Ivy were with my mom and Ivy kept trying to touch Olivia's mouth and nose - it was so sweet. We stayed there till about 7:00 pm then headed home. Fed Olivia after getting home and changed her and she was ready for bed. It was a really nice day couldn't ask for anything better... Pictures coming soon for the day.

Friday, 16 November

It's Friday - finally..... So came home to two cats battling it out, they were crazy. So fed the wild pack and then played ball with Mocha and Riley outside. I had a couple of appointments today including a haircut and a doctors appointment. Like my haircut and much easier to take care of it when it's short. So when Kurt got home I had just finished giving the dogs baths. We went to his cousins house and we played wii - it was so much fun. Had a really good time, arm is sore from playing. After that, we went to Todd's house and played wii again. Todd had Dawn, Mike, Dan, Kim & Deona over too. It was a lot of fun, played quite a few games and around 12:30 or so we left. Got home and pretty much crashed. Exhausted - went to bed and fell asleep quickly.

Thursday, 15 November

This pretty much describes how I'm feeling today.... fuddy duddy of a day. I'm really glad the holidays are coming up soon. Been listening to the Christmas music on the radio hoping to get in the holiday spirit but nothing yet. Decorated half the house, still not feeling it. Hopefully after Thanksgiving, the Christmas bug will bite. So besides that - everything is going pretty good. Work has been really busy so days are flying by, animals are good, Kurt is good, just in a funk I think. When I got home, raked leaves again and did a little cleaning then took the rest of the night off and relaxed.

Wednesday, 14 November

I'm feeling Artsy Fartsy today. My creative juices are in rare form, I want to paint or draw... My goal is spend some time doing that tonight. Kurt has a party to go to, so I'm going to spend some alone time being Creative.

Well - That didn't work out so well. Work was really busy again, love that - the day flew by. After work, I had so much to do.... not so much by choice. I got home and the dogs weren't in their kennel (Thanks Kurt), they had gotten into their dog food bad and made a big mess plus let me a few surprises. So had to clean that up, mop and dissinfect. Then I had to give the dogs baths - they actually enjoyed that. Riley and Mocha both love bath time - it's extra pets for them. Then I went outside and raked again, I swear from the day before most of the leaves dropped. So did that, came inside, played with the crazy cats. Kurt got home then so we had some hummus - I was suppose to go out to dinner but got cancelled on so instead I went to Costco to get more dog food, bones, cat food, some appetizers for Thanksgiving and more Hummos. Got home, put stuff away, did dishes, made lunches for Thursday, cleaned up the kitchen and by then it was almost 10:00 and I was exhausted so I went to bed.... Not so much artsy fartsy.

Tuesday, 13 November

I was listening to the Indigo Girls - the song, I Believe in Love and lyrics just hit me as so poignant and perfectly fit.

When we tried to rework all of this
Each to their rendition
Painted ourselves in a corner
Lost for ideas blindly fishing
For a compliment or kindness
Just to bring us into view
But you could not interpret me and I could not interpret you

I remember that cold morning when the trees were black with birds
I tried to make out some connection, We were at a loss for words
After all that we've been through,I could not see giving up
Despite the picture of our coffee growing colder in the cups

I want to say that underneath it all you are my friend
And the way that I fell for you I'll never fall that way again
I still believe despite our differences that what we have's enough
And I believe in you and I believe in love

So we went rolling on down through the years,
Taking time off we could steal
Until the thief of things unreconciled, stuck it's stick into the wheel
Now we're tumbling in a freefall, No one's gonna go unscathed
But it's not because you held back and its not how I behaved

I want to say that underneath it all, you are my friend
And the way that I fell for you I'll never fall that way again
I still believe despite our differences that what we have's enough
I believe in you and I believe in love

There are avenues and supplements and books stacked on the shelf
Labyrinths of recovery in search of our best self
But most of what will happen now is way out of our hands
So just let it go and see where it lands

I want to say that underneath it all you are my friend
And the way that I fell for you I'll never fall that way again
I still believe despite our differences that what we have's enough
I believe in you and I believe in love
I believe in you and I believe in love

Monday, 12 November

It's a new week - Monday, it's gray out and been raining on and off all day. It's dark out most of the day too... Fall, I love it but the whole lack of light thing makes me down. Work has been really good lately, working on a new project that keeps me really busy and I like that. Wish it was always like this. So work good, home life good, everything seems to be on the upswing. I ended up selling my UofM vs. OSU tickets so happy about that. After work, more raking. It's been windy today so the yard is a mess.... I'm raking almost everyday. Oh well, soon the leaves will all be down and I can stop raking so much. Thanksgiving is next week... Wow, time is just flying by.

Sunday, 11 November

Feeling a lot better today - got a lot of sleep last night so I think that was really what I needed. Went to the gym with Michael, did shoulders. We then went to Target and actually met up with Kurt there. He just happened to be there. So ended up going home with him. We had a really nice day. We worked on a few things outside - Kurt put away the back fountain and I cut the last of the Hostas down and raked for a bit. We then headed out for lunch. We went to Topz - it's a healthier burger place, Turkey burgers and baked fries. Went to Wallmart, picked up green beans for Mocha (part of her meal) and then went up to Macy's. I exchanged my jacket, I got a bigger size. The small fit okay but the arms were a little short. We then came back home. I went to Blockbuster and got us a movie while Kurt organized his closet. I made us some dinner and we chilled watching TV for a little bit then pretty much fell asleep before 8:30. Yeah, 8:30 - I missed all the good Sunday shows.

Saturday, 10 November

Woke up feeling horrible, couldn't sleep, up most of the night getting sick - but I had a lot going on so with the lack of sleep and upset stomach I had to start my day. I got to pick up Claire at 10:00 am and brought her back home. My brother/sister in law and the kids were going to come over but they were all sick, my parents did come over though and got to spend the morning with Claire. She was so cute and it was really nice seeing her with the family. She was all smiley. Parents stayed for a couple of hours then Kurt and I headed out to the mall with Michael. We had lunch and walked around window shopping, didn't buy anything. Visited with Dan for a bit too. After that, came home put Claire down for a bit. It's a full time job with a baby - I was exhausted. I ended up falling asleep for a half hour or so. After that, brought Claire back home and then Michael and Dan came over. They brought over Chinese food, we ate, watched movies and chilled out. It was a very nice relaxing evening. I really enjoyed my day, being sick didn't matter - I was happy all day long.

Friday, 9 November

It's Friday and I'm so very thankful that the weekend is upon us. It's been a tough week, not much sleep so looking forward to catch up on some Zzzzz's. I ended up having a great day at work, extremely busy but that did make the day fly by. After work - got home and had a million things to do. Cleaning up the house, feeding the animals, raking (so much raking), emptied the dishwasher, vacuumed the house and cleaned the bathrooms. I had to meet someone in Plymouth, they were going to buy my UofM vs. OSU football tickets - well, big mistake - drove out there and then they decided they didn't want them. So while waiting for this person, I got a coffee at Caribou - well that ended up being a bigger mistake. The creamer or the mint syrup was bad and I ended up getting food poisoning. I was so sick to my stomach - throwing up all night long into the next morning. Ugh, it took me 3 days for my stomach to feel better.

Thursday, 8 November

Had a really good time yesterday - went and visited with our friends Bonnie and Michelle. It was Michelle's birthday (today actually is her birthday). We brought over dinner and dessert and we ate then played wii. What a fun game system. We played the bowling and boxing game - but let me tell you, I'm sore today. My arms are killing me. So it was a lot of fun, great seeing my girls and it was nice to just kick back and laugh again. It's been a while since I really laughed and I even won in bowling (211). Boxing on the other hand, I got my butt kicked by both Bonnie and Michelle.

Wednesday, 7 November

It's a little embarassing to say this this, but I find myself taking longer and longer to get ready for work/going out, etc. I have always considered myself pretty low maintenance - Shower, little lotion, little hair gel and really that was it. But the older I get, the more stuff I find myself buying and using in order to get ready every morning. I have a face lotion (that helps with wrinkles - I don't think it works but I'm not going to be stopping anytime soon), I had body lotion, I have special eye/forehead wrinkle cream, hair gel that makes my hair shiny and helps it look fuller (Yes, thining hair is a fact of life), Sensitive Toothpaste, deoderant, cologne.... It just amazes me how many "Products" I have to use now. I don't really think it's a case of vanity, it's more like necessity. Okay - maybe a little of both.

Tuesday, 6 November

I heard a song called "Want" and a line in it was "I don't know what I want, but I wan't it now". It just seems that so many people have that philosophy in life. I'm pretty sure I know what it is I want in life now. Just talking with some friends and they were talking about wanting to be in relationships (they were single) and the people in relationships were saying they wish they were single. Grass is always greener on the other side kind of thing. Anyway - I was just thinking about all the stuff in life that I want. For the most part, I really do have it - of course, who wouldn't want to have more money or a bigger house, nicer car, etc - but all of my basic needs are being met and being content is a pretty good feeling. I do need to work on my spending habits though and I think "having more money" will benefit from that. New goal - Write down everything I spend money on.... my shopping habits are out of control.

Monday, 5 November

My eyes are so dry right now, I feel like my eyelids are sticking... Sounds pretty gross, but what can you do. My office has the heat blasting right now, the fact that I'm wearing a wool sweater is not helping at all. As soon as I get home, sweater comes off and the visine goes in. So besides my Dry Eye condition, everything else is going pretty well. It's a Monday, so that goes without saying that things could be better.... at least I didn't get called into Jury Duty (It's been over a week of calling into the Court and finding out that I don't need to come in). So my goals of becoming a better person is being tested. I'm trying not to be the type of person that holds grudges or stays upset but I have to say that I am a little peeved over a recent squabble I have with a friend. Nothing major, I'm just trying to not let the little things bother me - but it is a difficult thing to do at times. Okay - I vented, I feel better. I have a lot going on this week and it's all by choice. Dinners and Coffee meetings with friends, dinner party and then Claire for the weekend.....

I really need to shave, I haven't shaved since last Tuesday - Tomorrow for sure - I'm going to get up early and shave.

Sunday, 4 November

I woke up starving... after sleeping for about 9 hours and really only having lunch and a bowl of cereal for dinner yesterday - I was famished. I had a poptart, bowl of cereal and some biscuits that I made on Friday. I think when I eat as soon as I get up, it makes me hungry all day long. So to combat my snacking, I decided to clean the house. I cleaned probably for about 8 hours - well, I did take several long breaks during that time but it was an all day thing. I was feeling a little run down all day, not sure if it was the fact that I got too much sleep or if it's the onset of a cold... anyway, I really didn't mind staying in all day. I didn't even brush my teeth or shower until 5:30 pm. I left the house for a few minutes just to get some more toothpaste and then pretty much went to bed at 7:30. What has happened to me????

Saturday, 3 November

Saturday mornings usually consist of me sleeping in a bit longer, enjoying a couple cups of coffee and watching some nonesense TV programs. Today was a little bit different, well a lot - I got up early, showered and headed out to pick up Claire. I generally would have been a little dazed if I normally had to get up early but today I was full of energy and a little on the anxious side. I picked up Claire at 8:30 and had a really remarkable day with her. Got back to the house by 9:00 - fed her, changed her and spent some quality time with her bonding. She has the most amazing smile and her coos and giggles can make anyone beam. Kurt headed out to Boston around 11:30 and I left shortly after that to meet my parents and my Aunt Sue/Uncle Dale for lunch in Hamtramck. We ate at a great Polish restaurant - it was so good, but the best part was that they got to meet Claire. They fell in love with her. Got some great pictures and she was so good with everyone. The lunch was wonderful and filling. After lunch, came home - changed her diaper and fed her again - then she took a little nap. Got a chance to do some cleaning. After about an hour, took her to the mall. She likes riding in the stroller so we went walking around the mall for about 2 hours or so. After that, brought her home and it was time for a feeding again. I tried taking the dogs and the baby for a walk - it was a little harder than I expected so only got around the block instead of the usual longer walk. After that it was time to take her back home. I was a little sad but I know I will see her soon. When I got home, I was exhausted - My arms were sore, I was hungry and very tired. I was going to go out with Joel for the evening but instead I think I fell asleep around - 9:30 pm. It just got me to thinking about how my life is going to change again and I'm really actually happy about that. I like staying in and relaxing at home, watching movies is my kind of relaxing.... and having someone else to care for gives me a greater joy then really anything else. I really have lived a pretty selfish life so I'm ready to change that.

Friday, 2 November

It's Friday.... and it's really cold. Got down into the 20's last night. I'm not ready for the cold yet, I like the fall - brisk weather is okay but cold, not so much. I like wearing sweaters and being comfortable but when it gets to the point that your bones ache from the cold then I become a not so happy person.

I had the weirdest dream last night, I dreamt that I was in a race but it wasn't a typical marathon kind of race. It was a full contact, do what ever you had to do to win kind of race. Most of the people in the race I knew, friends, family, coworkers. I had to push people down, step on other people, throw stuff - anyway, that was my dream. I don't remember if I finished or not. I've never thought of myself as kind of person that would do what ever it takes to succeed - I think I'm nicer than that. Maybe down deep I am more of a fighter than a lover....

Thursday, 1 November

So Halloween was last night and we ended up going to some friends house to pass out candy. So many kids, all dressed up trick or treating. Lots of very cute kids and surprisingly there were a lot of older kids as well. There were cheerleaders, cowboys, cats, dogs, Batman, Harry Potter - some kids had really detailed ornate costumes and others had on just masks. It just got me to thinking about all the different masks we wear everyday. The Happy face mask we put on even when were down/upset or the Professional business mask when we go to work, The Brave Face even though we may be scared, etc. I feel like I've been putting on the Happy Face mask a lot lately, trying to convince everyone around me that I'm fine, Happy Go-Lucky Eric. For the most part, I am very happy - I really don't have many complaints in life but sometimes I feel like I just want to stay in bed, pull the covers over my head and never get up. Truthfully I know, when people ask "How are you doing?" - all they really want to hear is "Fine", it's a form of politeness. It would be great though, if we could be completely honest and get off our chests how we are really feeling. So Today even though I may say "I'm fine" - honestly, I'm feeling a little down. I feel like I'm missing something, nothing physical like my wallet or chapstick it's something else.